Using CBT (Intro to One Approach…)

The following is a brief exercise in sitting quietly that introduces one approach in using CBT as a problem-solving skill. There are three steps: Identify, Examine, Reconcile.

Identify means to become aware of the underlying belief that gave rise to your reaction and the feelings that came up.

Examine means to look closely at the belief, to question and fully comprehend its validity and relevance.

Reconcile means to determine what could/should change, and how to go about it.

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To start: Get comfortable and begin this SQ as you normally do…bring your focus to the breath…and after a few, let’s 1) look at, and 2) learn about…using CBT:

Recall there are three steps: Identify, Examine, and Reconcile…

1. Identify – the belief(s) that were challenged or triggered…(you had the experience, you had a reaction, you felt the emotions and likely the urge to act…so what were the underlying beliefs that were violated or triggered? Try to identify them…)

• • • This can be easy to do…but actually isn’t (!), at least, not at first…because emotions tend to dominate and demand your Rider’s attention…
    • But also because beliefs are usually hidden from our conscious awareness of them, meaning they “operate” below that mindful level of the Rider…
    • The challenge (again, at least at first) is to recognize the automatic thoughts that also “accompany” reactions and feelings that come up. ATs “come up” from the Elephant but are normally missed, or simply “ignored,” because, again, both the emotion and expressed reaction naturally tend to dominate the Rider’s attention and drive one’s experience…
    • But ATs can reflect – and thus be a key in identifying – those beliefs that were triggered…as in violated, threatened, or questioned (thus resulting in negative emotions) yet also confirmed, validated, or shared (and thus resulting in positive emotions).
    • Start now to learn to ask, “What was going through my mind?” when you look at what happened “in the moment.”

2. Examine – the belief’s truth and relevance…

• • • What is the evidence that supports this belief? What is the evidence against? Use the inner lawyer…
    • Is this a kind of cognitive distortion? (B&W thinking, emotional reasoning, overgeneralizing…)
    • Is it appropriate to the situation (i.e., does it apply to what happened)?
    • What is the effect of holding (or holding onto) this belief?
    • What would happen if I modified, or even rejected, this belief?

3. Reconcile – the triggered belief’s consequence…

• • • Can/should I change/modify my belief? Or am I confident its correct and appropriate?
    • If I change my belief, how do I feel now about what happened?
    • If I change my belief, what can I, or should I, do now?
    • Whether I keep or change my belief, is there something I can do now to mitigate the consequence or prevent it from happening again (i.e., problem-mitigation[2])?
    • If I can’t change, or am not yet ready to change, am I ready to engage in acceptance[3].?

And so, one strategy in using CBT is the three steps:

1.  Identify – think Automatic Thoughts and “What was going through my mind…?”

2.  Examine – think Inner Lawyer…

3.  Reconcile – think “Retrain the Elephant…?”

Now take a few more breaths and, when you’re ready, step into the rest of your day…

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[1] Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. CBT is a formal therapeutic treatment for many mental disorders; but it is also a form of self-therapy, a skill that can be learned and applied to help one “figure out” why one is feeling, or reacting, in certain ways to what is going on in their life…and how to go about making desired change. See here for how CBT relates to the Elephant/Rider Model.

[2] Reducing the negative effects or impact of the triggering issue; this may involve problem-solving or finding ways to lessen, decrease the frequency or intensity of, or even avoid that triggering situation.

[3] Acceptance is a process, the “using” of a psychological skill…which involves recognizing that what is can’t (or won’t) be changed while directing your conscious effort to focus on doing the other things that make your life valued, meaningful, and rewarding.