A = the Activating event (i.e., the Adversity or Action) that triggers us “to feel” something

B = the Belief(s) we hold – and what our Elephant (our sub-conscious mind) uses in generating or creating our reaction to “A”

C = the Consequence – the feeling(s) and reaction our beliefs about the event caused, which “come up” (from the Elephant) and may then be recognized – that is, felt and experienced – by our Rider (our conscious mind) and in our physical symptoms

As the model indicates, what we experience (i.e., consciously) is a function of our Rider, who both perceives the triggering act and feels the consequence (i.e., is “moved by” the resulting emotion).  But note: it is our Elephant that actually “creates” the reaction – a rather complex, very fast, and “automatic” process within our sub-conscious mind – and “sends it up” to the Rider as feelings along with other directives that manifest in physical effects[1].

And sometimes what “comes up” is something…we’d like to change; the “Consequence” has been that we’re hurt, or afraid, or angry, or sad. Yet so often what we do instead is to try to avoid the consequence (i.e., we deny, distract, or delude ourselves[2]) – which is at best a short-term solution. There are better ways to manage, problem-solve, and improve our life experience; and one is learning the skillset of CBT.

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CBT is based on the principle that our thoughts can, and do, develop and evolve into our beliefs; for it is our beliefs (about who we are, what we value, what we believe is right and wrong, etc) that determine the reactions we have to life events. But then so much of what we believe is also due to our conditioning – that is, prior learning (especially as a child) that was simply accepted (most often unconsciously!), never questioned, nor deeply, truthfully understood.

Yet they’re there, in our Elephant…so many beliefs we have and some, even many, that need to be questioned, examined, better understood, and then often changed…or rejected. And while we don’t recognize or want to accept it, there’s also more than a fair amount of ignorance (i.e., not knowing) and delusion (i.e., misunderstanding and denial) that we carry “down there.”

Using CBT is a way to bring hidden and unexamined beliefs to light, expose prejudices and distorted thinking, expand our perspective, and see the world differently – as in more clearly and accurately! This is how we can positively change those consequences of our behavior and experience…and make our life – which includes how we affect the lives of others – better…

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[1] Meaning to look at, comprehend, critically analyze, and try to reconcile…

[1] E.g., sweating, chills, increased heart rate, facial expressions, etc…

[2] These are called Defense Mechanisms (ref CBT-4), which are “mental coping strategies” that serve to protect us from pain, discomfort, and worry. They include Avoidance, Repression, Rationalization, Projection, Sublimation…and they work – at least for a while (!) – by helping us to hide the truth from ourselves. We do this because sometimes the truth can be very difficult to accept, especially in the moment – as in being too embarrassing, or hurtful, or disgusting, or even terrifying.

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*Elephant/Rider Model: The Happiness Hypothesis, Jonathan Haidt, 2006.