7 Habits – GOODSTUFF

The 7 Habits...*

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REFERENCE
ELEPHANT/RIDER MODEL
- 1 Elephant/Rider Model
- 2 The Elephant…
  - 2.1 Training the Elephant
  - 2.2 Retraining the Elephant
  - 2.3 Feeding the Elephant
  - 2.4 Bias in the Elephant
- 3 The Rider…
  - 3.1 When the Rider Leads!
  - 3.2 Rider Modes
    - 3.2.1 Observing Self
    - 3.2.2 Processor Self
    - 3.2.3 The Inner Lawyer
  - 3.3 Bias in the Rider
- 4 Psychological Skills…
  - 4.1 #1 Psychological Skill
    - 4.1.1 Why Sitting Quietly
    - 4.1.2 Why SQ Works
    - 4.1.3 Ways to Engage SQ
  - 4.2 Self-Awareness
    - 4.2.1 The Observing Self
    - 4.2.2 Defusion
  - 4.3 Self-Regulation
    - 4.3.1 Step Back
    - 4.3.2 Acceptance
    - 4.3.5 Self-Talk
    - 4.3.7 Critical Thinking Skills
  - 4.4 CBT in the ERM
    - 4.4.1 Using CBT
  - 4.5 Workability
  - 4.6 Effective Criticism
  - 4.7 Appeal to the Elephant
- 5 Awakening…
  - 5.1 Conditioning
  - 5.2 Ignorance
    - 5.2.1 More on Ignorance
  - 5.3 Delusion
    - 5.3.1 The Elephant Duped
    - 5.3.2 A Dichotomy Disorder…
    - 5.3.3 The Wrath…
    - 5.3.4 Types of Delusion
SITTING QUIETLY
- Sitting Quietly
- 1 Self-Care…
  - 1.1 On Being…
  - 1.2 On Well-Being…
  - 1.3 On the Big Rocks…
  - 1.4 On Integrity
  - 1.5 Your North Star
- 2 Relaxation…
  - 2.1 Abdominal Breathing
  - 2.2 Box Breathing
  - 2.3 Relaxation Response
  - 2.4 A Calming Intervention
  - 2.5 Muscle Relaxation
- 3 The Observing Self…
  - 3.1 Using CBT
- 4 Defusion…
  - 4.1 …With Thoughts
  - 4.2 Getting Rid Of…
  - 4.3 …With Feelings
  - 4.4 …With Difficult Feelings
  - 4.5 …When Distressed
- 5 Acceptance
  - 5.1 Acceptance 101
LIFE PRACTICES
- Life Practices…
- 1 Self-Care
- 2 Well Being
- 3 Sitting Quietly
- 4 Personal Growth
  - 4.1 Awakening
  - 4.2 The Examined Life
  - 4.3 Goal Setting
- 5 The Habit of Discovery
- 6 Altruism (“Their-Care”)
COGNITIVE BEHAVIORAL THERAPY
- Change the World…
  - – The Captain
  - – The Subway
- Introduction to CBT
- Using CBT
- CBT Basic Concepts…
  - – Thoughts vs Feelings
  - – Core Beliefs & Conditioning
  - – Why We Learn
  - – Psychological Skills
- Defense Mechanisms
- Common Distortions
- Automatic Thoughts (ATs)
  - – Questioning ATs
  - – Examples of ATs
- Disputation Strategies
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…are Covey’s principle-centered guide to personal and professional growth, moving from dependence to independence (Habits 1-3), then to interdependence (Habits 4-6) with self-mastery, collaboration, and empathy, all sustained by a continuous self-renewal (Habit 7).

Habit 1: Be Proactive

...is about taking responsibility for our lives. This is the first habit because every other habit depends on our ability to act proactively (the Rider) to make things happen (like constructively change and "improve" ourselves) rather than waiting [and hoping] for them to happen (i.e., living reactively, which is all Elephant). More...

1 - Be Proactive CLOSE

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Habit 2 - Begin With the End in Mind

...is about having a plan. If we don’t make a conscious effort to visualize who we are and what we want in life, then we empower other people and circumstances to shape us instead. This habit is about identifying where we want to go and who we want to be. It means defining the personal, moral, and ethical guidelines that represent the life we want to live. More...

2 - Begin With the End in Mind CLOSE

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Habit 3: Put First Things First

...is about protecting time for what’s most important to us. Habit 1 focuses our effort on what we can influence. Habit 2 aims us in the right direction. Habit 3 is the day in, day out, moment-by-moment work that takes us to that vision. More...

3 - First Things First CLOSE

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Habit 4: Think Win-Win

...isn't isn’t just about being nice. It’s a character-based code for human interaction and collaboration.

Most of us learn to base our self-worth on comparison and competition. We think about succeeding in terms of someone else failing—if I win, they lose; or if they win, I lose. Life becomes a zero-sum game. We start to believe there’s only so much to go around, and if they get a big piece, there’s less for me; it’s not fair, and I’m going to do everything I can to get my share.

These paradigms of scarcity are worth shifting. Win-win is about constantly seeking mutual benefit in all human interactions—about finding solutions that are truly beneficial and satisfying for everyone involved. More...

4 - Think Win-Win CLOSE

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Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then To Be Understood

...is about listening before we speak. It's about learning to suspend our desire to respond automatically. It’s about practicing a deeper and more intentional kind of listening. And then, when it is our time to be understood, it’s about expressing our point of view in a clear and articulate way that keeps our audience’s needs in mind. More...

5 - Seek First to Understand, Then To Be Understood CLOSE

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Habit 6: Synergize

...is about working together to find new solutions to challenging problems. Synergy is when the sum is greater than its parts. It’s often expressed as an equation where 1 + 1 = 3, 10, or 1,000. Think of the ingredients in a recipe coming together to create a dish or each instrument in an orchestra creating a song. That’s synergy. More...

6 - Synergize CLOSE

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Habit 7: Sharpen the Saw

...is so named because dull or rusty tools are much less effective than clean and sharp tools. The same is true for us. This habit is about preserving and enhancing the greatest asset we have to deal with life and contribute—ourselves. It’s about balancing the four dimensions of body, heart, mind, and spirit.

As we spend time on each of these four dimensions of self, we create growth and change in our lives. We have the energy and vitality to practice the other six habits. We increase our capacity to produce results and handle the challenges around us. More...

7 - Sharpen the Saw CLOSE

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^*7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey, 1989.

The 7 Habits...*

Habit 1: Be Proactive

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Habit 2 - Begin With the End in Mind

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Habit 3: Put First Things First

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Habit 4: Think Win-Win

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Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then To Be Understood

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Habit 6: Synergize

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Habit 7: Sharpen the Saw

Sitting Quietly (SQ) is first a self-care practice, one of calming renewal and connection…it’s also “the vehicle” of introspection, enabling discovery, insight…and healing.

Life Practices are particular activities we engage on a more or less regular basis, using skillsets we learn and develop, and that serve to make our lives meaningful, productive, and rewarding…

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Mindfulness defined...

SQ

Sitting Quietly (SQ) is first a self-care practice, one of calming renewal and connection…it’s also “the vehicle” of introspection, enabling discovery, insight…and healing.

LP

Life Practices are particular activities we engage on a more or less regular basis, using skillsets we learn and develop, and that serve to make our lives meaningful, productive, and rewarding…